Crazy Cracker Rant

Please pardon this interruption. Sometimes I'm ashamed of being from this area... well not really... just ashamed that there are so many people also from this area that act like they were born in the sticks of some backwoods town with one stop sign and no evidence of dentistry, AND they are so ignorant they think it's just fine and dandy to swagger around with toothpicks hanging out of their mouths on their way to pick up some beer at the L&L around midnight.

As Granny, Enid, and I pulled into the driveway tonight, a truck came in behind us. We couldn't see who it was because of their headlights being so bright, but it looked a lot like Great Grandpa's at first. Granny got out of the car, and before she could even walk over to the truck the guy started saying some crazy talk about a car just like hers following him around all night. She told him she had no idea who he was or what he was talking about, because she had just driven back from her daughter's house. By the way, we followed a semi all the way home and saw no other traffic for miles. That guy's truck appeared out of nowhere behind us. Granny said she thought he said something about being sorry, but he kept mouthing off about calling "the law" ('cause you know, that's what it's officially named around here) as he drove away, so me being me couldn't contain myself and I hollered back at him that he was trespassing and he'd better get outta heeeeeah before we called "the law" on him. Crazy redneck cracker, go home and sleep it off or you might miss the big fish shoot tomorrow.

I think I feel better now, but Granny doesn't like me speaking up like that... I don't blame her. You never know what the natives might do 'round these parts.

Don't come back now, ya' hear?